Girl, Interrupted

Just when,......

you think you're finally on your way, finally getting there, life steps in, shoves you to the side and the next thing you know, life as you know it is nothing more than a three-ring side show with YOU hanging by that proverbial thread.

Pass the brownies please,....thank you very much!

Not long ago I saw, for the first time, the movie, Girl, Interrupted, starring Winona Ryder, Angelina Jolie, Whoopi Goldberg and the late Brittany Murphy.

 GREAT film and if you haven't seen it, you should check it out. It takes place in the 60's and Winona plays Susanna Kayson, who wrote the story, (true account), of her 18 month stay in a mental hospital. Once there she meets other young women with all kinds of "issues" and, well, let's just say the problems that her fellow patients face is a big eye opener for Ms. Kayson, especially when she allows herself to get sucked into the whacked world of Lisa Rowe, (Angelina Jolie).

I could really relate to Winona's character, Susanna, but then I have found that I can relate to just about every character Winona plays in all her movies so maybe I just connect with Winona herself somehow. And I actually knew a girl exactly like Lisa Rowe and found myself tangled up in her mental illness making choices that can only be termed as (pretty darn), "bad". It was a time in my life, (in the 70's), that my seemingly uneventful, normal world was exposed to an unbalanced side of living that changed my naive perspective. Lessons such as these are good - they show us that everything doesn't fit together like a pretty picture puzzle.

Sometimes the pieces, no matter how hard you try to shove them together, just don't/won't fit. 

Pardon Me

So, just like Winona's character, Susanna, who's life gets so rudely interrupted with a heavy dose of reality, so has mine. My 20's was interrupted with being stalked and abused, (for ten long years). 2006 found my life devastatingly interrupted with the sudden death of my Mother, divorce after 11 years of marriage and the unexpected suicide of my son - all happening in a 5 month span. And now, well, my life is interrupted with joblessness, homelessness and being downright penniless. "Interrupted" is a gross understatement when it comes to how my life has been, but whatever way ya look at it, these events totally disengaged me from the plans I set forth in my life.

"Interrupted" is such an innocent and polite term, way too innocent and polite to describe the disruption and carnage that my life has been faced with but out of all that rubble some good has been delivered.

 But then I guess it's all in how you look at it. There are times I want to just lay down and die, to give up, to give in and let the interruptions be the demise of me and all my silly dreams. Not easy being 55 years old and having to accept that not only are my bright and shiny life-long dreams, born when I was just a young girl, totally interrupted, they were totally and devastatingly annihilated, never to be fulfilled or seen again...ever.

Excuse Me

One thing I've learned through all the interruptions in my life is that eventhough I ended up on more detours than I would have ever imagined, there were some divine paths presented to me that I'm actually grateful for. The friends I've made, the people I've met have all gifted me with better insight, a new perspective and comfort in order to let go and embrace hope once more.

I don't know how I'm going to fare once I find my way to other side of my life's most recent interruption, but I do know that Jesus is strong by my side, that my Father God will never forsake me and no matter where I end up, it will be where He wants me to be. 

Just like it is when someone barges in and so rudely interrupts what we're doing, sometimes we just have to be still, wait and when the time is right, step boldly back out into the Light and follow the path, whether it be old, new or totally bizarre, making no sense at all.

This is OUR journey, our stepping stones and the worst thing we can ever do is allow ourselves to be totally derailed.

 Yeah,...Girl, interrupted,.... just be sure to save me some brownies!